Michael Van Dam, LCSW, Bountiful, Utah

Michael Van Dam, LCSW, graduated from the University of Utah with a Masters Degree in Social Work in 2002. Michael's emphasis and objective as a counselor is to assist individuals find peace and cultivate hope through the development of emotional resilience and self-reliance.  As an Acceptance and Commitment Therapist (ACT), Michael guides and motivates individuals to live values-directed lives.  As an Emotionally Focused Therapist (EFT), Michael is particularly invested in strengthening marriage and family relationships.  Michael has a depth of experience assisting men break habits of sexually compulsive behavior and helping couples heal from the associated trauma.

Beyond his training as a clinical counselor, Michael became certified as a Music Therapist through Utah State University. Michael graduated with a degree in cello performance from the University of Utah and performed as a member of the Orchestra at Temple Square.

An appointment can be scheduled with Michael through contacting him at 801-815-6152.

Dragons & Music Therapy. Michael Van Dam, LCSW

Billie Bixbee was rather surprised when he woke up one morning and found a dragon in his room. It was a small dragon, about the size of a kitten. The dragon wagged its tail happily when Billy patted its head. Billy went downstairs to tell his mother. "There's no such thing as a dragon!" said Billy's mother. And she said it like she meant it. In Jack Kent's children's book, "There's NO Such Thing as a DRAGON" we learn that this dragon that Billie insisted was real but that his Mom refused to acknowledge, by the afternoon, filled the whole house with its head hanging out the front door, its tail hanging out the back, and there wasn't a room in the house that didn't have some part of the dragon in it. Only when Billy's Dad came home who too saw that something was wrong did Billy's mother admit that there was indeed a DRAGON in the house. Ironically, the dragon again "wagged its tail happily. Then, even faster than it had grown, the dragon started getting smaller. Soon it was kitten-size again. "I don't mind it this THIS size," said Mother. "Why did it have to grow so BIG?" "I'm not sure, said Billy, "but I think it just wanted to be noticed." Dragons, big or small, are often lodged within our own minds and hearts and too need to be noticed, acknowledged, talked about, comforted, and made small in order for them to not become overwhelming. Yet often there isn't opportunity, permission, or ability to talk about these dragons. As a music therapist, I love to use music to help this happen, both in individual as well as in group therapy. Music has the power to help access, open, and express thoughts and feelings that can be more difficult to do in conversation alone. Dragons that may seem daunting may in surprisingly short amounts of time become quite manageable with a little creative opportunity. Michael Van Dam, LCSW Michael can be reached at 801.815.6152 to schedule an appointment.

A Course on Strengthening Families

“Come Home”

A course on Strengthening Families

This course is geared toward parents, single parents, grandparents and any others seeking to fortify and secure their homes and families, recognizing the concern that family foundations are being eroded by external pressures and corrosive influences. The group is designed to be both educational and experiential such that group members will have vision and enthusiasm for what is possible for them to create in their own homes. The principles outlined will be explored through the application of music, literature, and group discussion.

   Reinforcing principles of:

1)     Seeing Things as they Really Are

2)     Creating Simplicity (Prioritizing)

3)     Securing Family Relationships

4)     Practicing Christ-like Parenting

5)     Creating Family Culture

Thursday Evenings at 7:00 – 8:30 pm

October 25 – November 29

Cost: $150

Please contact Michael Van Dam, LCSW for details

801-815-6152

Resilient Solutions, Inc.

1355 N. Main, Ste 3, Bountiful

Principles for Individuals, Couples and Families

As a counselor to individuals, couples, families, and children, I find it satisfying to be able to together with clients discover sound and at times even simple solutions to relational and/or behavioral problems that initially may appear to be complex and difficult to resolve. A model called, "The Parenting Pyramid" presented by The Arbinger Company makes a lot of sense to me. Here's a summary of what the pyramid tells us as it applies to families, though it can be generalized to groups or organizations far beyond the family. Here is how it goes:

1. Although correction is a part of parenthood, IT IS THE SMALLEST PART.

2. The key to effective correction is effective teaching.

3. The key to effective teaching is a good parent/child relationship.

4. The key to a good parent/child relationship is a good husband/wife relationship.

5. The key to a good husband/wife relationship is our personal way of being. Indeed, this quality affects every other aspect of the pyramid; that is why it is the deepest foundation.

When we are wanting to address a concern at any level of the pyramid, it becomes vital that we consider how effectively we are performing in everything that lies below that level and address those matters first or at least simultaneously with the concerns at hand.

I love being given opportunity to apply principles such as this to guide individuals, couples, and families in resolving challenges efficiently, effectively, and with much satisfaction. I can be reached at 801-815-6152 to schedule and appointment.

Michael Van Dam, LCSW

Resilient Solutions, Inc.

Parenting Forum. Michael Van Dam, LCSW

A vital way to help a struggling child is to help the family.  Many children's mental, emotional and behavioral challenges can emerge from disruptions in home life and family relationships.  Fortifying families can help preempt conditions that can later require extensive treatment to correct.  Held weekly on Tuesdays, 7-8:30 PM.  Parents may attend as long and as frequently as they feel would be beneficial.  $250 per couple or individual.  For registration, please contact Michael Van Dam, LCSW, at 801.815.6152 or vandam. michael@gmail.com

Group for Children with parents who are divorced

See that the "children aren't forgotten" when divorce occurs.

10-week group to begin Tuesday, January 10th.  ($250/10 weeks)

Children who live in divorcing families often experience their primary relationships as "unpredictable and double binding". These children manage the resulting anxiety by narrowing their feelings and ideas about themselves, other people, and relationships into "very simple and rigid patterns". They become distrustful and begin to avoid closeness as a means of creating safety for themselves. They become distrustful and hard to reach such that they are difficult to engage (see "High-Conflict, Violent, and Separating Families" by Vivienne Roseby, Ph.D and Janet R. Johnston, Ph.D).

Michael Van Dam, LCSW, is offering an interactive group designed to demystify children's responses to divorce, to reduce anxiety and shame related to their family experience, to know that "they aren't the only one", and to establish a "new normal" to help them proceed with assurance, confidence, and hope in their lives. As a Certified Music Therapist, I will incorporate musical interventions into the group format.
For information, contact Michael Van Dam, LCSW, 801.815.6152
or email:  vandam.michael@gmail.com

Children of Divorce

See that the "children aren't forgotten" when divorce occurs.

Children who live in divorcing families often experience their primary relationships as "unpredictable and double binding". These children manage the resulting anxiety by narrowing their feelings and ideas about themselves, other people, and relationships into "very simple and rigid patterns". They become distrustful and begin to avoid closeness as a means of creating safety for themselves. They become distrustful and hard to reach such that they are difficult to engage (see "High-Conflict, Violent, and Separating Families" by Vivienne Roseby, Ph.D and Janet R. Johnston, Ph.D).

I am am now offering an interactive group designed to demystify children's responses to divorce, to reduce anxiety and shame related to their family experience, to know that "they aren't the only one", and to establish a "new normal" to help them proceed with assurance, confidence, and hope in their lives. As a Certified Music Therapist, I will incorporate musical interventions into the group format.
For information, contact Michael Van Dam, LCSW
vandam.michael@gmail.com
801-815-6152

Children when Divorce Occurs.

See that the "children aren't forgotten" when divorce occurs.


Children who live in divorcing families often experience their primary relationships as "unpredictable and double binding". These children manage the resulting anxiety by narrowing their feelings and ideas about themselves, other people, and relationships into "very simple and rigid patterns". They become distrustful and begin to avoid closeness as a means of creating safety for themselves. They become distrustful and hard to reach such they are difficult to engage (see "High-Conflict, Violent, and Separating Families" by Vivienne Roseby, Ph.D and Janet R. Johnston, Ph.D).

Michael Van Dam, LCSW, MT-BC is now offering an interactive group designed to demystify children's responses to divorce, to reduce anxiety and shame related to their family experience, to know that "they aren't the only one", and to establish a "new normal" to help them proceed with assurance, confidence, and hope in their lives. As a Certified Music Therapist, Michael will incorporate effective musical interventions into the group format.
For information, contact Michael Van Dam
vandam.michael@gmail.com
801-825-6152

Children Adjusting to the Consequences of Divorce

Michael Van Dam, LCSW, MT-BC, will be offering a group for children who are adjusting to the consequences of divorce to begin in October. Contact him at 801.815.6152 for more information about this group and individual and family therapy.

Individual, Family, and Child Therapist

Michael Van Dam, LCSW, MT-BC.  Individual, Family and Child Therapist.  Michael is trained and experienced in working with individuals, couples, families and children in the following areas:

*Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for children and adults with anxiety, depression, ocd, add, adhd, odd, and aspergers.
*Individual and group therapy for children adjusting to the consequences of divorce.
*Individual and Group Parent Coaching (emphasizing principles from "Parenting with Love and Logic").
*Family Counseling.

Michael recognizes that treatment becomes especially efficient and effective when he is given opportunity to involve parents, families, physicians, and school teachers in treatments. 

You may contact Michael at 801.815.6152, email: vandam.michael@gmail.com. 

Child Therapy. Parent Coaching.

Often just a few rather simple adjustments in parenting can with consistent application improve a child's previously obstinate behavior, strengthen the parent/child relationship, and cause parenting to be a more satisfying and hope filled experience. Here are some tips:


Focus less on the child's behavior but rather on your response to their behavior. Stay calm. Demonstrations of anger, irritation, or frustration often reinforce the child's negative behavior. In truth, a child feels, though often won't admit it, that he feels more safe and secure when he sees that the parent is capable of handling a difficult situation without falling apart. Warnings and reminders are not necessary. These only give a child more opportunity to leverage and manipulate a parent. Avoid demands or threats by instead creating conditions upon which you as a parent are willing to meet a child's request: "You'd better . . . or else", or "If you don't . . . then you can't . . .", can be replaced with, "As soon as . . . then I would be happy to . . . , or "Those who . . . get to . . . ". The parent is then able to step back from the situation and allow the child to be up against the consequence of his choice rather than to the parent's demand or threat. It is OK for a child to disagree, even throw a tantrum (if it is done in a place such as a room where others are less effected). Give the child as many decision making opportunities as possible within parameters that the parent sets, where the parent can live with the consequences of the child's decision. This gives the child a sense of control, builds confidence in the child, and allows the child to experience and learn from the consequences of their decisions. Finally, be sure that whatever happens, the child feels loved. Remember this statement and consider it before you respond to negative behavior: "A parent does not have the right to discipline a child for whom they don't feel love." No discipline will be effective over the long run if the child does not know they are important and valuable to the parent.

Contact Michael Van Dam, LCSW, 801.815.6152 for individual therapy, family therapy, and parent coaching.  He has taught several courses in Parenting with Love and Logic as well as offering a course for children whose parents are going through a divorce. 

Love and Logic to Challenging Children

An eight-week course and discussion group will begin this Wednesday, January 12th, at 7 pm at Resilient Solutions, Inc., 1355 N. Main, Ste 1, Bountiful, Utah

This group will by offered by Michael Van, Dam, LCSW. To register contact him at 801.815.6152 or email: vandam.michael@gmail.com.

The cost is $120 per person or $200 per couple.